10250 North Freeway @ West Road
Houston, Texas 77037
Tel: (281) 447-8484
10250 North Freeway @ West Road
Houston, Texas 77037
Tel: (281) 447-8484
Parents and Their Precious
Children
Written by Dr. Lester Hutson
Chapter Two
Deuteronomy 31:12-13
Introduction.
I am about to bring to your attention Six Vital Issues to Discuss With You Child. Do not assume that your child comes into this world knowing anything. He doesn't. He must learn. He was born with certain propensities. He may be aggressive or introverted. He may be musical or athletic, effeminate or macho, prone to addiction or a natural leader. Children also inherit traits from their parents. A child's size, looks and other physical traits come with them from their ancestors. Propensities and inherited traits do not mean a child comes here knowing his own name, that fire is hot or who his own parents are. He does not know a language or recognize a danger. These things must be learned. Even while growing inside mommy, children begin to learn. They learn to recognize certain sounds and voices, pick up on the moods of mom and get used to times of rest and activity; but this learning is minimal to that which is just ahead. The day a child is born, he is essentially ignorant. Exceedingly intelligent? Yes! Educated? No!
Consequently, your child is extremely vulnerable. He simply does not automatically know much of the information he needs to compete effectively in life; and he is not likely to ever know unless someone tells him. His great vulnerability lies in the fact that there is always someone out there who will capitalize on his ignorance, and there are those who will give him false and wrong information on many of life's critical issues. This false information and guidance can destroy your child. Our social landscape is strewn with multitudes of pathetic cases of wrecked, miserable lives that are the direct result of corrupt, wrong information received in the early, formative years of life. The result is not only drug addictions, broken homes, poverty, criminal behavior, child abuse, atheism and untold heartache. Many others have fallen into such despair as to take their own lives.
Until I began preparations for this message, I had never recognized how clearly this reality is stated in Deuteronomy 31:12-13. Listen to this passage call for the good instruction of all people, especially children. "Gather the people together, men, and women, and children, and thy stranger that is within thy gates, that they may hear, and that they may learn, and fear the LORD your God, and observe to do all the words of this law: And that their children, which have not known any thing, may hear, and learn to fear the LORD your God, as long as ye live in the land whither ye go over Jordan to possess it." Note well the statement, "their children, which have not known any thing." This verse confirms biblically that people do not inherently know. They must be taught.
Not long ago, I heard a radio spot saying, "Talk to your child about drugs. If you don't, who will?" That question struck me with great force. If you don't, who will? That is a good question to ask when it comes to many important issues. You can be sure that someone will! It may be an older brother, the neighbor's kid, a drug dealer on the street, a tv or movie personality, a humanistic or atheistic school teacher or some other person who doesn't know or respect the truth. Unfortunately, the information that someone else gives may be poison to his mind and ultimately produce his ruin and untimely death.
Parent, it is you who should talk to your child about the important issues of life. Don't assume he already knows, and don't assume he will learn the straight of things out there somewhere. If you want your child to know the truth and the straight and proper understanding of the critical issues of life, tell him yourself.
There are many important issues that should be addressed. In this message, I will mention six. These are so very critical and such high profile issues in today's society. As I discuss briefly these areas, keep asking yourself, If I do not talk to my child about these issues, who will?
I. INTEGRITY.
A. Integrity is a broad term.
1. Webster defines it as "The quality of being honest and trustworthy; honesty or uprightness." The Hebrew word is tom which is defined by James Strong as "completeness." Strong goes on to explain that it usually has to do with moral innocence.
2. Integrity has to do with right and wrong, good and evil, moral choices.
3. Parent, nothing will affect your child more in the long run than the moral choices he makes.
Many naively and erroneously tend to think that morality has to do only with sex. Whether or not one tells the truth is a moral issue. Failure to pay what you owe is dishonest. Paying your debts therefore is a moral issue. Those who do not pay have no financial integrity. Taking advantage of people in a business deal is a moral issue as is cheating your employer by not doing your work.
Just about every action you can imagine grows out of a moral decision or position. Somewhere back there behind every law is a decision related to good or bad, right and wrong.
B. Parent, your child desperately needs a moral grid in his life.
1. All through life, he is going to have to make decisions; and each decision will ultimately grow out of his moral conscience.
2. Who is going to teach your child right and wrong? His little buddies at the day care? His friends in the neighborhood or at school? His school teachers? His college professors? The media? Hollywood?
Remember, somebody will.
3. Parent, you need to bring up the subject of what is right and wrong and explain to your child WHY. Life is a continuing laboratory. It provides lots of opportunities to address fundamental honesty. As they grow up, you have plenty of occasions to (1) deal with lying and telling the truth, (2) handle mistreatment of others, (3) address theft, (4) work on attitudes and (5) teach purity and holiness. Character is an on-going course in life. That is why you hear Proverbs 22:6 saying, "Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it." "Train" implies more than a one-time lesson.
4. Satan is eager to teach your child what to value. He wants to teach him irresponsibility. Isaiah 5:20 says, "Woe unto them that call evil good, and good evil; that put darkness for light, and light for darkness; that put bitter for sweet, and sweet for bitter!" If you don't talk to your child about right and wrong, this could well be him. This world is full of people who are doing this very thing this day.
II. MONEY.
A. Money will have an enormous bearing on the life of your child.
1. James 2:16 mentions "those things which are needful to the body." Food, clothing, shelter, transportation, education, taxes and most other things in life cost money. Though we can do with many of the things we think to be necessities, the fact is that some material things are necessary to life and they cost money.
2. Your child is going to be involved with money all of his life. He desperately needs to know how to manage it, and that knowledge is not inherent. Children must be taught how to deal with money.
3. Let me remind you too that money has one of the greatest powers on earth to ruin and destroy people. 1 Timothy 6:10 says, "For the love of money is the root of all evil: which while some coveted after, they have erred from the faith, and pierced themselves through with many sorrows." Solomon said in Proverbs 28:8, "He that by usury and unjust gain increaseth his substance, he shall gather it for him that will pity the poor." Jeremiah said, "As the partridge sitteth on eggs, and hatcheth them not; so he that getteth riches, and not by right, shall leave them in the midst of his days, and at his end shall be a fool" (Jer. 17:11).
Ill-gotten gain, greed, covetousness, hoarding, slothfulness, misuse and waste are all terms associated with money.
B. Deliberately and specifically talk to your child about money.
1. Teach him who owns everything. Psalm 24:1.
2. Teach him that he's a steward and what stewardship is. 1 Cor. 4:1-2.
3. Teach him the connection between work and money. 2 Thes. 3:10.
4. Teach him the connection between education and money. Prov. 4:7-9.
5. Teach him to invest. Prov. 11:24.
6. Teach him to give. Luke 6:38.
7. Teach him that money is a tool, not a savior or master. 1 John 2:15.
8. Teach him practical things about money like accounting, how to balance a checkbook, the dangers of credit cards and sales pressure and credit.
III. SEX.
A. I assure you that sex will become an issue with your child.
1. The body will see to that, as will friends (especially of the opposite sex) and predators. Curiosity and questions abound regarding sex.
2. I am amazed at how often parents act as if sex is not an issue with their child and that it never will be. That is really naive.
3. The reality is that "God created man in his own image, in the image of God created he him; male and female created he them" (Gen. 1:27). God told that male and that female to "Be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth" (Gen. 1:28). Cut it however you wish, but God authorized and commanded them to have sex. There is no other way to obey His command.
4. Parents, it is going to happen. Your child is going to engage in sex one way or another, either the right way or the wrong way.
a. If you don't talk to your child about sex, he will experiment and listen to information off life's black market. Most of what he gets will probably be wrong and perverted. It will cause him (and you) much heartache. On the black market, he is likely to be told good is evil and evil is good. Out there, he is likely to be introduced to fornication, promiscuity, adultery, homosexuality and lots of bad sexual behavior.
b. By talking to your child, you can teach him that which is good, wholesome and right about sex.
B. Some things about sex which you should discuss with your child. (These should be addressed at the proper stages of growth.)
1. A sex education course about the physical body should begin early.
2. Somewhere at or about puberty, you should talk to your child about the opposite sex. (This should not be all at once or in one setting.)
a. Explain the differences.
b. Explain God's purposes in sex.
c. Explain the moral issues of sex and its limitation to marriage.
d. Explain the severe consequences of violating God's plan for sex.
3. Explain sex perversions and warn your child of perverts and predators.
4. Let your child know that he can talk to you about sex.
IV. DRUGS.
A. Drug abuse is so common these days and an aggressive effort will doubtless be mounted to snare your child.
1. Do not think that your child will escape recruitment effort. In discussing mystery Babylon of the end of time, Rev. 18:23 says, "by thy sorceries were all nations deceived." Truly today, the drug problem is a worldwide menace. No son or daughter is safe.
2. Do not allow your child to be introduced to drugs by a friend down the street, a school mate or a pusher. Make sure you are the first to discuss drugs and the drug culture with your child.
B. You should take deliberate steps to fortify your child by warning him and educating him about drugs and drug abuse.
1. First, warn him that there is a danger out there. Be specific.
2. Warn him as to the source by which he is likely to be approached.
3. Warn him about specific drugs and their consequences. Include tobacco.
4. Teach him to turn from the appearance of this evil. 1 Thes. 5:22.
V. THE LAW.
A. Your child will not automatically be a law-abiding citizen.
B. Talk to him about civil law and government.
1. Discuss the role of law and law enforcement people. Rom. 13.
2. Warn him about civil disobedience. Rom. 13:3.
3. Teach him to obey the law. Titus 3:1-2.
VI. MANHOOD AND MOTHERHOOD.
A. Dads should discuss manhood with their sons.
1. Talk about how to be a spiritual leader to a family.
2. Talk about taking responsibility and the role of a man.
B. Mothers should discuss motherhood with their daughters.
1. Talk about the role of a wife and mother. Proverbs 31.
2. Talk about what it means to submit and follow.
C. Above all, talk about the place Jesus Christ should occupy in life.
"It Does Make a Difference What You Believe"